Post Title. 11/22/2011
What kind of culture develops a New Testament disciple?
Last month we looked at the question, "What are we trying to produce?" This month I want to ask, "What kind of culture (environment) produces a New Testament disciple?" Most church ministries focus on getting people connected and serving. If we are not satisfied with that and want to see spiritual maturity in the form of discipleship, we will need to come up with a different strategy.
The default culture in most churches and men's ministries is characterized by programs. Success is based on how many programs and how well they are attended. Each program, like a hot air balloon when launched, looks attractive but can only drift along with the cultural winds because it has no power of its own.
Last month we looked at the question, "What are we trying to produce?" This month I want to ask, "What kind of culture (environment) produces a New Testament disciple?" Most church ministries focus on getting people connected and serving. If we are not satisfied with that and want to see spiritual maturity in the form of discipleship, we will need to come up with a different strategy.
The default culture in most churches and men's ministries is characterized by programs. Success is based on how many programs and how well they are attended. Each program, like a hot air balloon when launched, looks attractive but can only drift along with the cultural winds because it has no power of its own.
However, the culture Jesus developed to make disciples was not a program but a process. Stepping back and looking at the gospel storyline, it becomes obvious that Jesus had a plan in mind for developing His disciples. There were stages of development with corresponding experiences that fit the maturity of the men in training. The stages could be called:
Come and See (John 1:39)
Follow Me (Matthew 4:19)
Be with Me (Mark 3:14)
Go for Me (John 20:21)
Jesus intentionally and progressively equipped these men to the point where He could release them to reproduce what He had done with them.
Each metaphor of the Christian life used in the New Testament involves process:
Physical Model: a person
Organic Model: a plant
Architectural Model: a building
Athletic Model: a runner
Until we intentionally create a culture that recognizes process we will not develop mature disciples in our ministries. No one expects a child to act like an adult, a seed to bear fruit or a building to stand without a foundation. A discipling culture has a clearly defined process, resulting in kingdom expanding power.
Come and See (John 1:39)
Follow Me (Matthew 4:19)
Be with Me (Mark 3:14)
Go for Me (John 20:21)
Jesus intentionally and progressively equipped these men to the point where He could release them to reproduce what He had done with them.
Each metaphor of the Christian life used in the New Testament involves process:
Physical Model: a person
Organic Model: a plant
Architectural Model: a building
Athletic Model: a runner
Until we intentionally create a culture that recognizes process we will not develop mature disciples in our ministries. No one expects a child to act like an adult, a seed to bear fruit or a building to stand without a foundation. A discipling culture has a clearly defined process, resulting in kingdom expanding power.
A jet engine is an illustration that captures both process and power. It can be applied to a men's ministry in particular or the whole church in general.
The plane represents the church and one of the engines represents the ministry to men providing needed power for the plane. Other ministries, if they are designed on the same model, could become additional power sources giving the church increased altitude and distance.
The plane represents the church and one of the engines represents the ministry to men providing needed power for the plane. Other ministries, if they are designed on the same model, could become additional power sources giving the church increased altitude and distance.
A Process/Power Model
On a simple scale a jet engine is an environment where air is pulled into the engine chamber (a ministry culture), squeezed to a higher pressure, and ignited by inserting fuel and spark. The result is combustion and a high volume of air being blown out the exit chamber. This process produces “thrust” or power. When connected to a plane this power propels it forward, keeping it in flight. The genius of the jet engine is both its simplicity and efficiency.
On a simple scale a jet engine is an environment where air is pulled into the engine chamber (a ministry culture), squeezed to a higher pressure, and ignited by inserting fuel and spark. The result is combustion and a high volume of air being blown out the exit chamber. This process produces “thrust” or power. When connected to a plane this power propels it forward, keeping it in flight. The genius of the jet engine is both its simplicity and efficiency.
Each phase of the jet engine process is unique and has its own principles and dynamics. It is important that each phase is integrated and connected to the next in order to get the maximum power. Likewise, an intentional discipling men's ministry creates an environment where men move from immaturity to maturity, from seeker to leader. The power comes as men are released as mature, servant leaders to invest in Kingdom expansion.
Each phase of the process is designed to accomplish something critical for the next step in the maturing process. The resources needed for each phase are different, emphasizing different issues. In this case one size doesn't fit all. But with each step a person's relationship with Christ and their kingdom responsibilities are increased.
Each phase of the process is designed to accomplish something critical for the next step in the maturing process. The resources needed for each phase are different, emphasizing different issues. In this case one size doesn't fit all. But with each step a person's relationship with Christ and their kingdom responsibilities are increased.
The critical combustion area can be likened to the equipping environment of the maturity process. This unique environment requires a higher degree of intensity and commitment. It involves the fuel of training, the pressure of accountability, and the spark of modeling to be effective.
An intentional discipling culture creates a clear pathway for people to move from seeker to servant leader. It doesn't expect everyone to mature at the same rate but makes the pathway visible, practical, and accessible. It is a place that demonstrates both grace and truth and invites and challenges each person to take their next step.
If we are to develop New Testament disciples, we will have to change our church culture from the default setting of random events and programs to the intentional pathway of connected next steps that invites and challenges each person to grow up into Christ and become His royal representatives, expanding His kingdom into every nation.
An intentional discipling culture creates a clear pathway for people to move from seeker to servant leader. It doesn't expect everyone to mature at the same rate but makes the pathway visible, practical, and accessible. It is a place that demonstrates both grace and truth and invites and challenges each person to take their next step.
If we are to develop New Testament disciples, we will have to change our church culture from the default setting of random events and programs to the intentional pathway of connected next steps that invites and challenges each person to grow up into Christ and become His royal representatives, expanding His kingdom into every nation.
- Is your men's ministry a random collection of unrelated activities or is there a process and clear pathway?
- Can you describe to someone how your ministry events fit together and will help participants take the next step?
- Do you have environments for inviting and challenging men to step up to a deeper commitment to Christ, developing a greater responsibility to live out their identity in Christ?
- Do you have opportunities for men to be equipped to know Christ, reflect Christ and share Christ?
- Are the men in your church passive or engaged as servant leaders?
- Are you developing leaders or just hoping they will show up?
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What are we trying to produce? 10/20/2011
Without an intentional strategy, the best we will do is develop a cultural Christian, one who looks a lot like the culture but with a Christian veneer. Last month I asked the question, "Are we using men/women or equipping them?" This month I want to look at the question, "What are we equipping them to become?"
Many men's/women's ministries rely on current Christian topics for their plan. Who is the current popular author/speaker? What is selling? What are the hot topics that men are interested in? Often the topic is determined by what the current leader is interested in? If he/she has been helped by a book, then certainly others should be interested. So we offer a class or small group based on the latest book hoping to create interest so people will come to something besides the worship service. And usually we can get a handful together on any given topic.
Yet most churches (and their men's/women's ministry) have as their mission statement an expression of the Great Commission to make disciples of Christ. But the challenge comes when asked, "What does that look like?" "How does your ministry describe a disciple of Christ?" If we can't describe it clearly, we wind up shooting an arrow at the side of a barn and then painting a target around it, announcing with confidence, "Look, we hit the bull's-eye!". Our goal becomes to produce whatever we have. No chance of failure there.
Stephen Covey made popular the statement, "Begin with the end in mind". What if we stop and ask the question, "What should success look like through our men's/women's ministry?" What kind of person are we trying to develop?" If we say a disciple of Christ, then what are the convictions, character and competencies that would reflect Christ rather than simply the culture?
The word “call” or “calling” is used in Scripture to mean an invitation to faith (salvation) in Christ. It also refers to Christ’s invitation to follow him in every way, everywhere, all the time. This calling relates closely to the concept of discipleship when Jesus called twelve men out from the crowd and equipped them to follow him 24/7. Most of the gospel record is the account of those men learning to be his disciples: struggling, progressing, failing, yet gradually learning. They were common, ordinary men who were personally transformed and commissioned to launch a movement that changed the world. Those men, having been with Jesus, were so radically marked by him that even their enemies took notice (Acts 4:13).
Discipleship was a common term used both in the Hebrew and Hellenistic worlds of the first century. There were disciples of Moses as well as Aristotle. The Greek definition of the word disciple means a learner. Jesus, however, was not Greek but Hebrew. The Hebrew word is talmid which, in the cultural context, means one who follows and imitates the Rabbi’s in all areas of life. A disciple of Jesus was one who surrendered to him and his ways.
If we follow Christ through the Gospels, we can develop a pretty clear picture of what he considered to be his disciple. He did not leave it up to each generation and culture. On several occasions he made the statement, "If you...then you are my disciple" or "if you do not....then you are not my disciple". If we are to begin with the end in mind, these critical statements should become foundational to our calling, our equipping and our success.
Consider the following passages and a corresponding description as you think through what you are trying to produce:
1. Whole Life Transformation
"A pupil (disciple) is not above his teacher; but everyone, after he has been fully trained, will be like his teacher” (Luke 6:40).
A disciple is one who identifies with Christ, whose whole life is being transformed to share his character, values, purpose and destiny.
2. Sacrificial Allegiance
"If anyone comes to Me, and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be My disciple” (Luke 14:26).
A disciple is one who intentionally submits to the authority and leadership of Christ, choosing His kingdom over self interests.
3. Faithful Obedience
“So Jesus was saying to those Jews who had believed Him, "If you continue in My word, then you are truly disciples of Mine; and you will know the truth, and the truth will make you free" (John 8:31-32).
A disciple is one who continually makes God’s Word the final authority for all of life, seeking to know His truth, obey His commands, and live by a biblical world view.
4. Servant Love
"A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another" (John 13:34-35).
A disciple is one who has an increasing love for others expressed by grace, community, and acts of service.
5. Spiritual Fruitfulness
"My Father is glorified by this, that you bear much fruit, and so prove to be My disciples” (John 15:8).
A disciple is one who continually abides in Christ resulting in godly character and kingdom influence.
Discipleship is not a course that we complete or series of activities we attend; rather it is a life-long pursuit. Neither is discipleship the result of personality, gifting, or abilities; it is the result of choosing to submissively and faithfully follow Christ. The qualities Jesus identified are not a check list to be accomplished, but marks of the path we are to follow. (For more information on the marks of a disciple, see the HighQuest unit: His Calling)
Are these traits typical of the men/women in your ministry? Are they even identified? Is leadership modeling the pursuit of these traits and inviting men to join them. How are you describing the product of your ministry? What will happen if we take these traits seriously? What would happen if we don't?
Many men's/women's ministries rely on current Christian topics for their plan. Who is the current popular author/speaker? What is selling? What are the hot topics that men are interested in? Often the topic is determined by what the current leader is interested in? If he/she has been helped by a book, then certainly others should be interested. So we offer a class or small group based on the latest book hoping to create interest so people will come to something besides the worship service. And usually we can get a handful together on any given topic.
Yet most churches (and their men's/women's ministry) have as their mission statement an expression of the Great Commission to make disciples of Christ. But the challenge comes when asked, "What does that look like?" "How does your ministry describe a disciple of Christ?" If we can't describe it clearly, we wind up shooting an arrow at the side of a barn and then painting a target around it, announcing with confidence, "Look, we hit the bull's-eye!". Our goal becomes to produce whatever we have. No chance of failure there.
Stephen Covey made popular the statement, "Begin with the end in mind". What if we stop and ask the question, "What should success look like through our men's/women's ministry?" What kind of person are we trying to develop?" If we say a disciple of Christ, then what are the convictions, character and competencies that would reflect Christ rather than simply the culture?
The word “call” or “calling” is used in Scripture to mean an invitation to faith (salvation) in Christ. It also refers to Christ’s invitation to follow him in every way, everywhere, all the time. This calling relates closely to the concept of discipleship when Jesus called twelve men out from the crowd and equipped them to follow him 24/7. Most of the gospel record is the account of those men learning to be his disciples: struggling, progressing, failing, yet gradually learning. They were common, ordinary men who were personally transformed and commissioned to launch a movement that changed the world. Those men, having been with Jesus, were so radically marked by him that even their enemies took notice (Acts 4:13).
Discipleship was a common term used both in the Hebrew and Hellenistic worlds of the first century. There were disciples of Moses as well as Aristotle. The Greek definition of the word disciple means a learner. Jesus, however, was not Greek but Hebrew. The Hebrew word is talmid which, in the cultural context, means one who follows and imitates the Rabbi’s in all areas of life. A disciple of Jesus was one who surrendered to him and his ways.
If we follow Christ through the Gospels, we can develop a pretty clear picture of what he considered to be his disciple. He did not leave it up to each generation and culture. On several occasions he made the statement, "If you...then you are my disciple" or "if you do not....then you are not my disciple". If we are to begin with the end in mind, these critical statements should become foundational to our calling, our equipping and our success.
Consider the following passages and a corresponding description as you think through what you are trying to produce:
1. Whole Life Transformation
"A pupil (disciple) is not above his teacher; but everyone, after he has been fully trained, will be like his teacher” (Luke 6:40).
A disciple is one who identifies with Christ, whose whole life is being transformed to share his character, values, purpose and destiny.
2. Sacrificial Allegiance
"If anyone comes to Me, and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be My disciple” (Luke 14:26).
A disciple is one who intentionally submits to the authority and leadership of Christ, choosing His kingdom over self interests.
3. Faithful Obedience
“So Jesus was saying to those Jews who had believed Him, "If you continue in My word, then you are truly disciples of Mine; and you will know the truth, and the truth will make you free" (John 8:31-32).
A disciple is one who continually makes God’s Word the final authority for all of life, seeking to know His truth, obey His commands, and live by a biblical world view.
4. Servant Love
"A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another" (John 13:34-35).
A disciple is one who has an increasing love for others expressed by grace, community, and acts of service.
5. Spiritual Fruitfulness
"My Father is glorified by this, that you bear much fruit, and so prove to be My disciples” (John 15:8).
A disciple is one who continually abides in Christ resulting in godly character and kingdom influence.
Discipleship is not a course that we complete or series of activities we attend; rather it is a life-long pursuit. Neither is discipleship the result of personality, gifting, or abilities; it is the result of choosing to submissively and faithfully follow Christ. The qualities Jesus identified are not a check list to be accomplished, but marks of the path we are to follow. (For more information on the marks of a disciple, see the HighQuest unit: His Calling)
Are these traits typical of the men/women in your ministry? Are they even identified? Is leadership modeling the pursuit of these traits and inviting men to join them. How are you describing the product of your ministry? What will happen if we take these traits seriously? What would happen if we don't?
Are we using men or equipping them? 09/20/2011
What is the purpose of the ministry to men in your church? Get them connected? Get them serving? Get them giving? Most men see the church as a place that wants their attendance and taxes...serving and giving in church language. They see little connect between church and what they face every day.
Every athlete and coach knows that the "core" is essential to success regardless of the particular sport. Strengthening and maintaining the core is a constant emphasis from the little leagues to the big leagues. Coaches and managers know that if an athlete is weak at his core, it won't be long before he is on the injured reserve list, sitting on the sidelines in street clothes, watching the game. Coaches and athletes know what is required to strengthen and maintain the core muscle groups of the body. So exercises are designed and discipline is applied to develop and maintain this core.
If we are to have an effective ministry to men in the church, we must develop and strengthen the spiritual core of a man's life. Failure here and we should not be surprised to find men sitting on the sidelines in street clothes....at best watching the game but more likely not even in the stadium.
However, I find in working with men's leaders in churches that little attention is paid to the spiritual core. Most men's opportunities revolve around service. Consider an interview I heard recently between a well-known Christian talk show host and a well-known church leader. The conversation went something like this....
Host: We are failing to reach men in our churches today; they are not engaged.
Guest: That's right and it's because we do not understand how men are wired.
Host: So how should we treat men differently than women to get them involved?
Guest: Men are doers. Men are not attracted to classrooms and lectures. We need to give men opportunities to serve so they can do something of value, to contribute, to lead... to accomplish.
...In other words, the key to reaching men is to get them serving.
Another popular approach is to help men discover their gifts. Almost every church I work with has some highly visible and promoted venue for helping men and women discover their gifts. The logic goes like this:
If we are to change men from spectators to players, we must consistently, intentionally, and effectively equip them at their core to follow Christ, not as a course they take but as a direction they pursue, not as a Sunday activity but as the "set" of their heart...a way of life.
In the Old Testament, the phrase "set of his heart" was used frequently as the reason for a king's success or failure. Rehoboam did not "set his heart on the Lord" and it led to evil (2 Chronicles 2:14). But Ezra "set his heart" to seek God and he prospered (Ezra 7:10). Reading the account of the kings of Judah in 2 Chronicles reveals that many started well but ended poorly. Their destiny and legacy had to do with the "set" of their hearts. Their examples illustrate that setting our hearts on the Lord is neither automatic nor permanent. I think "setting their hearts to seek the Lord" was the Old Testament version of New Testament discipleship.
Our ministry to men must fundamentally equip them to set their hearts on Christ and not simply use them to serve our cause. The battlefield is strewn with the bodies of men who were used but not equipped. They were talented, willing and we had a need. We plugged them into our ministry of service, but eventually they collapsed from fatigue, discouragement, or disillusionment. Some keep serving but there is no passion, no spark, no fire.
Equipping men to set their hearts to follow Christ as a lifestyle is built around our spiritual core. The core, using Michael Behe's term, is the "irreducible complexity" of discipleship.
By irreducibly complex I mean a single system composed of several well-matched, interacting parts that contribute to the basic function, wherein the removal of any one of the parts causes the system to effectively cease functioning. (Darwin's Black Box: The Biochemical Challenge to Evolution)
I would suggest that our spiritual core, the irreducible complexity, is made up of three interdependent, essential pursuits:
· Knowing Christ deeply: our vertical relationship
· Reflecting Christ authentically: our inward relationship
· Sharing Christ intentionally: our outward relationship
If we want men on the spiritual playing field and not just serving snacks in the stands, we must equip them to strengthen and maintain their spiritual core. We cannot do it for them, but we can teach them how. We can create opportunities for instruction, practice, encouragement, and celebration.
So how effective is your core training? Are your men aware of what is essential? Are they intentional at developing and maintaining it? On a scale of 1-10, how would you assess your own life in these three pursuits?
In the months ahead we will look at the kind of culture that develops the core, that sets and keeps a man's heart on Christ.
Every athlete and coach knows that the "core" is essential to success regardless of the particular sport. Strengthening and maintaining the core is a constant emphasis from the little leagues to the big leagues. Coaches and managers know that if an athlete is weak at his core, it won't be long before he is on the injured reserve list, sitting on the sidelines in street clothes, watching the game. Coaches and athletes know what is required to strengthen and maintain the core muscle groups of the body. So exercises are designed and discipline is applied to develop and maintain this core.
If we are to have an effective ministry to men in the church, we must develop and strengthen the spiritual core of a man's life. Failure here and we should not be surprised to find men sitting on the sidelines in street clothes....at best watching the game but more likely not even in the stadium.
However, I find in working with men's leaders in churches that little attention is paid to the spiritual core. Most men's opportunities revolve around service. Consider an interview I heard recently between a well-known Christian talk show host and a well-known church leader. The conversation went something like this....
Host: We are failing to reach men in our churches today; they are not engaged.
Guest: That's right and it's because we do not understand how men are wired.
Host: So how should we treat men differently than women to get them involved?
Guest: Men are doers. Men are not attracted to classrooms and lectures. We need to give men opportunities to serve so they can do something of value, to contribute, to lead... to accomplish.
...In other words, the key to reaching men is to get them serving.
Another popular approach is to help men discover their gifts. Almost every church I work with has some highly visible and promoted venue for helping men and women discover their gifts. The logic goes like this:
- Everyone has a spiritual gift
- You should discover yours
- Good stewardship demands it
- Personal fulfillment requires it
- Our church needs it
- Sign up now
If we are to change men from spectators to players, we must consistently, intentionally, and effectively equip them at their core to follow Christ, not as a course they take but as a direction they pursue, not as a Sunday activity but as the "set" of their heart...a way of life.
In the Old Testament, the phrase "set of his heart" was used frequently as the reason for a king's success or failure. Rehoboam did not "set his heart on the Lord" and it led to evil (2 Chronicles 2:14). But Ezra "set his heart" to seek God and he prospered (Ezra 7:10). Reading the account of the kings of Judah in 2 Chronicles reveals that many started well but ended poorly. Their destiny and legacy had to do with the "set" of their hearts. Their examples illustrate that setting our hearts on the Lord is neither automatic nor permanent. I think "setting their hearts to seek the Lord" was the Old Testament version of New Testament discipleship.
Our ministry to men must fundamentally equip them to set their hearts on Christ and not simply use them to serve our cause. The battlefield is strewn with the bodies of men who were used but not equipped. They were talented, willing and we had a need. We plugged them into our ministry of service, but eventually they collapsed from fatigue, discouragement, or disillusionment. Some keep serving but there is no passion, no spark, no fire.
Equipping men to set their hearts to follow Christ as a lifestyle is built around our spiritual core. The core, using Michael Behe's term, is the "irreducible complexity" of discipleship.
By irreducibly complex I mean a single system composed of several well-matched, interacting parts that contribute to the basic function, wherein the removal of any one of the parts causes the system to effectively cease functioning. (Darwin's Black Box: The Biochemical Challenge to Evolution)
I would suggest that our spiritual core, the irreducible complexity, is made up of three interdependent, essential pursuits:
· Knowing Christ deeply: our vertical relationship
· Reflecting Christ authentically: our inward relationship
· Sharing Christ intentionally: our outward relationship
If we want men on the spiritual playing field and not just serving snacks in the stands, we must equip them to strengthen and maintain their spiritual core. We cannot do it for them, but we can teach them how. We can create opportunities for instruction, practice, encouragement, and celebration.
So how effective is your core training? Are your men aware of what is essential? Are they intentional at developing and maintaining it? On a scale of 1-10, how would you assess your own life in these three pursuits?
In the months ahead we will look at the kind of culture that develops the core, that sets and keeps a man's heart on Christ.
Post Title. 08/25/2011
Why Focus on Ministry to Men?
As we start a new church year, what will the focus of your local church be this year? I suggest we focus on MEN. There are 108,000,000 men in America 15 years of age and older. How are they doing? Take a look at some of the numbers I copied from an article a few years ago. I forgot the source, but assume for a moment that these stats, if not fairly accurate, are close.
Men & Culture
· Men will change jobs on an average of every 3.2 years and will have 14-16 jobs in their lifetime. Men, especially
as fathers, are more than eight times more likely to be portrayed negatively on television than women.
· Men are four times more likely to die from suicide than women with white males having the highest rate. Men
make up 93% of the present prison population.
· 95% of Christian men, with the average age of 40, state that they do not have a best friend who is a male.
· There are 68,000,000 pornographic search engine requests every day – a vast majority from men. Note: This
makes up 25% of all search engine requests.
Men & Church
· 66,000,000 men in America make no profession of faith.
· 6,000,000 women in America come to church each week without their husband.
· 85% of lay leadership in American churches are women.
· Young men who attend church will tend to disengage from church at nine years of age.
· When the church reaches the man of the home, 93% of the time the entire family will follow. This compares with
3.5% when reaching children/youth and 17% when reaching wiives/mothers.
Men & Family
· 40% of married men who attend church will get divorced.
· Women initiate 66% of divorces after the age of 40.
· The divorce rate for couples who pray together daily is 1 out of 1,152.
· 1,000,000 children in America each year will be affected by divorce.
· 33% of all children in America are born out of wedlock.
· Men with children will talk with their child 11 days (accumulative hours) in a lifetime.
· 90% of men in the church will have children who will leave the church.
Most men's ministries in churches are a disconnected set of poorly attended activities. We are content if we get men to attend something, anything... from pancake breakfasts, golfathons, or Habitat for Humanity work days. Our men's ministries activities are often like a bunch of hot air balloons drifting along with the cultural winds, launching as many as possible, frantically trying to keep them aloft. Are we entertaining men or are we equipping them?
If we are not entertaining men we are using them. We think since men are doers, let's give them something to do. This will make them feel needed, wanted and connected. This strategy will activate some men, but eventually this too will fail as men see the church as a place that only wants their service and their money...not a whole lot different from the other community service groups to which they belong. Are we using men or equipping them?
If the above stats are even close to accurate, then we need to seriously figure out how to equip men to lead in their personal, family, business, and church life. We need to develop leaders rather than just hope they survive. We need to equip them to walk with God in an unfriendly if not brutal world.
Is this perception valid? How is your church equipping men to walk with a real God in a real world?
As we start a new church year, what will the focus of your local church be this year? I suggest we focus on MEN. There are 108,000,000 men in America 15 years of age and older. How are they doing? Take a look at some of the numbers I copied from an article a few years ago. I forgot the source, but assume for a moment that these stats, if not fairly accurate, are close.
Men & Culture
· Men will change jobs on an average of every 3.2 years and will have 14-16 jobs in their lifetime. Men, especially
as fathers, are more than eight times more likely to be portrayed negatively on television than women.
· Men are four times more likely to die from suicide than women with white males having the highest rate. Men
make up 93% of the present prison population.
· 95% of Christian men, with the average age of 40, state that they do not have a best friend who is a male.
· There are 68,000,000 pornographic search engine requests every day – a vast majority from men. Note: This
makes up 25% of all search engine requests.
Men & Church
· 66,000,000 men in America make no profession of faith.
· 6,000,000 women in America come to church each week without their husband.
· 85% of lay leadership in American churches are women.
· Young men who attend church will tend to disengage from church at nine years of age.
· When the church reaches the man of the home, 93% of the time the entire family will follow. This compares with
3.5% when reaching children/youth and 17% when reaching wiives/mothers.
Men & Family
· 40% of married men who attend church will get divorced.
· Women initiate 66% of divorces after the age of 40.
· The divorce rate for couples who pray together daily is 1 out of 1,152.
· 1,000,000 children in America each year will be affected by divorce.
· 33% of all children in America are born out of wedlock.
· Men with children will talk with their child 11 days (accumulative hours) in a lifetime.
· 90% of men in the church will have children who will leave the church.
Most men's ministries in churches are a disconnected set of poorly attended activities. We are content if we get men to attend something, anything... from pancake breakfasts, golfathons, or Habitat for Humanity work days. Our men's ministries activities are often like a bunch of hot air balloons drifting along with the cultural winds, launching as many as possible, frantically trying to keep them aloft. Are we entertaining men or are we equipping them?
If we are not entertaining men we are using them. We think since men are doers, let's give them something to do. This will make them feel needed, wanted and connected. This strategy will activate some men, but eventually this too will fail as men see the church as a place that only wants their service and their money...not a whole lot different from the other community service groups to which they belong. Are we using men or equipping them?
If the above stats are even close to accurate, then we need to seriously figure out how to equip men to lead in their personal, family, business, and church life. We need to develop leaders rather than just hope they survive. We need to equip them to walk with God in an unfriendly if not brutal world.
Is this perception valid? How is your church equipping men to walk with a real God in a real world?
